The boys are playing a made up game called Cats and Rats. They try to toss underwear up on our hanging light fixture that hangs on the higher ceiling above our staircase. They laugh, holler, scream... Merit just came to me telling me they have been disqualified. Their dad told them Cats and Rats had gotten TOO LOUD!
I made Pear Butter today... oh my goodness yum!
Vance and I tried to write our will yesterday. I am still
emotionally exhausted. NO one could ever love these kids like we do... I know this is how every parent (almost every parent) feels about their children... but oh my.
Also, it is very real to me that people die. Both my mom and my nephew Case died without any warning. Completely healthy and then gone... so I need to be realistic. It is responsible to plan for what would happen if I were no longer here.
Natasha is such an inspiration to me as she continues to allow God to heal her as they miss Case deeply. She finds JOY in life and is such a loving, kind, reasonable, responsible person.
Reese, Natasha and Lane are remarkable and I thank God for that.
I feel very misunderstood since Case's death. I can't imagine how Natasha and Reese must feel at times. Also, people say really strange things sometimes and it is hard at times to let those things go. But there has been a great deal of support and love shown too. Many people expect one to get over the loss of a loved one soon... no one wants a "downer" for a friend, mom, niece, wife... you get the picture. Funny, I didn't mention sister... that is one thing that is fabulous about my siblings. I think they would still spend time with me even if I were a "downer"
Really I should stop now, because I am usually the girl who just kind of smiles through the frustration or sadness. I have so much to be thankful for and can usually remain positive. My smile is fading a bit today however... poor Willem had a crying UNO partner earlier this afternoon. He asked if I needed to take a break and rest on the couch for a bit!! But I am certain tomorrow will be a better day.
I am loving these kids and am "running" a lot. I am tired at times, but mostly it feels really good. Tomorrow I will get a much
needed chunk of exercise and try to introduce a healthier diet. Today I had coffee, coffee and more coffee and ate some of the kids meal scraps... oh yeah and I sampled the Pear Butter!
Hazel has been sleeping good at night. This is a huge blessing.
Hazel is taking STEPS!!!
Hazel, I'm girl crazy cause of you.
I love you sweetie.