As I looked at all of the darling children singing about Jesus, I noticed our son, Willem, had broken a hole through the knee of his pair of "nice" brown pants. I knew they were wearing thin, but a hole?? Oh yeah, he had fallen in the 10 degree cold on the pavement on his way into his preschool. Also that morning his hair was so full of static! Miss Pat tried to apply a little lotion :). Miss Claudia could tell by the look on my face I had had better days... feeling a bit emotional, lacking some sleep and feeking like I can't quite keep up. She gave me a chocolate and said she'd pray for me... two pretty great things a friend can do. :)
Then I wondered during the program why I hadn't bought Willem new pants, put a little hairspray in his hair and just been more aware.
I have moments of feeling inadequate - but I am guessing we all do. I am an irresponsible pet owner, I'm indecisive, I can be an emotional mother, a wife who often considers the needs of her children before the needs of her husband. Some days there just isn't enough of me to go around. Or at times I become critical of myself and think if I were a "better me" there would be enough of me to go around. This time of year can be hectic and emotional too. But in the past few days I have been so blessed by friends and their encouragement. And more importantly I have been blessed by the power of prayer.
I am feeling some regret, along with sadness regarding a recent decision I've made - not something I want to get into now but it has felt tough. And it has triggered lots of emotions.
It is very wonderful to have a baby in the house and Merit and Will couldn't be better big brothers, but I have a lot to do and a lot to keep track of. I love my days with these children, they are precious gifts.
Liz, Kelly, Kris, Natasha and Daphine -- thank you for helping me deal with life this week! Most of us are doing the best we can with what we've got. God places some pretty incredible people in our life. And these women, this week, were the support I needed.
Happy Birthday today to my friend and husband Vance -- I am grateful for his dedication and love.
Today is a good day, a day where I am stopping to count my blessings! -- our little angel Hazel is as content as can be. The boys are finally getting some FRESH air playing baseball outside with the neighbor kids... they were a bit stir crazy. It has been sooo cold here, like 10 degrees. Vance and I are enjoying a quiet house, if only for twenty minutes.
Christmas Programs -- a highlight of our week
Willem, striped shirt, front row :)
Merit, plaid shirt on the end
4 comments:
Hang in there Michele! Being a Mom is the toughest job on earth! I can tell that they are signing "Jesus" by the little girl in red next to Willem. Good work Mom! That's all that really matters anyway! Love You, Mindy
i hear ya about this being a crazy time. i was just trying to remember to put paige in a dress for the xmas program (last yr i forgot and caiden was in jeans) and then i get there and every child is all fancy and in xmas colors. duh!! why did i put her it hot pink???? it's xmas! red and green!!! oh well, at least it was a dress.
Awww.. those are such sweet pictures! I bet that was a fun program! I could not even begin to imagine being a Mom to 3 children! Don't be so hard on yourself. It sounds like you are doing a great job! I hope Vance had a wonderful birthday!
The preschool pictures are adorable of Willem. It is so easy to think you have it down after you've had two and what is one more. But adding another person to the house is a HUGE adjustment. I found with two I felt like I was balancing, and three is a juggling act and sometimes running in circles. Being a mom of a baby is exhausting especially when you are up everynight for months. I am thinking of you often. Hang in there, and I KNOW you are a wonderful Mom and Wife!
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