Friday, March 6, 2009

LIFE

March is a difficult month for me. Although I have tried to tell myself it is just another month, it is a month of sadness and a month that I allow myself to feel the hole I have in my heart.
March is the month I lost my mom.
I allow myself to go through piles of pictures in March along with old albums and sometimes home videos. I allow myself to read a few precious cards she wrote me and.... I let the sadness surface.
March had always been to me a month of new life... before losing my mom. Here in Washington March provides so many beautiful signs of spring and new growth. Daffodils are blooming, tulips are coming up, there is new green on lilac bushes... the baby chicks and ducks are delivered to the feed stores. It is a month of LIFE.
But one month it became a month with a very painful death.
For a number of years I believe I still thought of March more as a month of death than new life... but in this recent year I had to remind myself, although my mom left this earth and at the young age of 45 none of us were ready to see her beautiful spirit go... it was also in March that she began her NEW LIFE. She had Jesus in her heart and her faith was strong, her new life began on March 25th... several years ago.
I will let the sadness surface... I believe that is healthy and ok.
But this March I am ready to be thankful for new LIFE.

12 comments:

Katie said...

I'm sorry for your tough times...by sharing this, you make us all grateful for what we take for granted, like our mom's. May we have some bright, spring days to help take away the gloom this March! Thinking of you...

Natasha said...

March is a hard month... Your words are a great reminder that she does have new life and we need to celebrate that! I miss all of the buds on trees and bulbs coming up in WA. They always reminded me of her because she loved that so much. We are so blessed to KNOW exactly where she is!

Maria said...

Your message brings tears to my eyes. You have such a great attitude about life, always thinking of the positive. Thank you for reminding me of what I have to be grateful for in life. What an awesome way to celebrate your mom's life with all the beautiful flowers in Spring!

theSNAPsisters said...

I remember your mom-she was a beautiful lady. I can picture her smiling on your family. God bless

April said...

Michele~
That was beautifully written! Losing your mom is very difficult to bear...my mom passed away 9 years ago in Nov. I miss her just as much now as I did then. Sometimes, I'll take out her pictures and have myself a good cry. However, I am comforted in knowing that she is HOME and I will see her, again, one day. God Bless You as you try to find your way to a "new life".

Alisa said...

Sweet friend, loss is so difficult. I'm praying for you today. I wish I could have known your mom. She sounds like she must have been an amazing woman, just like her daughter.:)

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear about your Mom! I can see how March can be so difficult for you. There is a lot of comfort in knowing she is in Heaven with Jesus and that someday you will see her again.

Daphine said...

What a beautiful post! I am sorry to hear about you losing your Mom. You're right, it is okay to let the sadness surface and still deal with it in a healthy way. I pray that this month will be easier for you than it has in the past. Thanks for shaing!

Worsham Family said...

Oh Michele, I have no words, other than I am thinking of you and I hope you can find some peace in the days ahead. Love Shelli

Daphine said...

Praying for you today!

Sandy said...

Good morning Michele
I guess you and i have a lot in common for the month of March. Even though mom has been gone just a week I sure miss her so much. I know she would want me to be happy and carry on but I sure feel your pain. Thank you for sharing your feelings with all of us.

Lesha said...

I love the first signs of spring and when I am working outside I think about mom more than anything else. Sometimes just letting the sadness surface is a healthy to do. I wish I was there to cry with you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OPJ!!!

THIS KID IS THE BEST!!! PRAYIING BLESSINGS OVER YOU OREN! WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!